Monday, February 29, 2016

i'll eat you up, I love you so....

Today I've finally "let it all go." The past few weeks I've been angry, moody, judgmental and just plainly ungrateful. It's affected my relationship with family, friends and co-workers.  Most of you know our struggles with infertility and as much has it pains me to talk about it I'm done letting it control me. It consumes me enough with doctor visits, medications, and tracking. I won't let it destroy the happiness in front of me. 
This weekend I had the opportunity to spend some time with my patient, gracious and giving husband. Sometimes I think in infertility we overlook their struggle too. Now I'm not saying this is every couple but for me it has. 
His been by my side for every failed attempt, negative pregnancy test, painful injections and discouraging news. And how does he take it, you ask? Whelp with patience, grace and love for me. He holds me tight, tells me I'm a beautiful daughter of God, reminds me that it's not the end and that will keep trying tell we are told we cannot conceive. Of course in all this I'm in tears, frustrated and probably yelling. Yet he stands their firm, quiet, still and by my side. 
The lord has given me a man that I sometimes think I don't deserve but I don't know where I'd be without him. This photo below "I'll eat you up, I love you so," couldn't be more true.
Letter and Picture Frame from Michael's
"i'll eat you up, i love you so" Where the Wild Things Are -From Love to Design.
Giveaway for the Where the Wild Things Are design on my Instagram  
I've been letting all this infertility eat me up completely. I refuse to continue this way. In the weeks coming I plan to smile a little more, laugh, breathe and remember I was given a companion whom loves and cares for me. Family and friends whom offer support and comfort. No matter what I'm not alone and whatever happens is Gods plan. Here's to eating the world up with love and appreciation. 

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